Monday, December 27, 2010
Monday, September 27, 2010
A Break
Hello dear friend; you have been missed.
My search on my path of life continues as I trek through my senior year in high school. I have taken my ACT twice so far, with no luck for getting into a prestigious school. So, I have decided to wait. Not because my father wants me to go to community college, because I do. Because, after all, it is my choice.
I always told myself if I went to to community college then I would live with my mom. Not because I would have to depend on my mom, no, but because I love her. Her and I are like best friends. I get along better with my mom then any of my friends do. Plus I guess there is the fact that she helps me with most things in my life. So maybe I would be depending on her...?
I don't think I am ready to leave home yet, or at least not all the way. I will be happy to run far away from my father. But not too far, I need him to pay for his, oh so precious, "cheaper" college plan. After that I'd like to be rid of him.
Going to community college will help open my path, I hope. I have been thinking a lot lately about my future career and it has been pulling at me. I know that for sure I want to do something in the field of art; I just don't know what.
Wish me luck! <3
My search on my path of life continues as I trek through my senior year in high school. I have taken my ACT twice so far, with no luck for getting into a prestigious school. So, I have decided to wait. Not because my father wants me to go to community college, because I do. Because, after all, it is my choice.
I always told myself if I went to to community college then I would live with my mom. Not because I would have to depend on my mom, no, but because I love her. Her and I are like best friends. I get along better with my mom then any of my friends do. Plus I guess there is the fact that she helps me with most things in my life. So maybe I would be depending on her...?
I don't think I am ready to leave home yet, or at least not all the way. I will be happy to run far away from my father. But not too far, I need him to pay for his, oh so precious, "cheaper" college plan. After that I'd like to be rid of him.
Going to community college will help open my path, I hope. I have been thinking a lot lately about my future career and it has been pulling at me. I know that for sure I want to do something in the field of art; I just don't know what.
Wish me luck! <3
Friday, July 23, 2010
Randomness About Drawing, Imagination, and Stick Figures
After reading this over I have no idea what I was getting at. Then why did I pick this entry?
AP ENGLISH III JOURNAL ENTRY #7
One of my favorite things to do is draw. Drawings can make your mind grow, but your mind can also make your drawing grow. People can use thier imaginations in different ways. Mine? I use it for drawing. Imagination may show us what we want to see in our drawings, but our minds are the ones that help sculpt that image. There are so many different people in the world and so many different expressions that they can make. Stick figures may be boring after a while, always seeing the same blank face. At least a stick figure with a face has some kind of personality. Right?
AP ENGLISH III JOURNAL ENTRY #7
One of my favorite things to do is draw. Drawings can make your mind grow, but your mind can also make your drawing grow. People can use thier imaginations in different ways. Mine? I use it for drawing. Imagination may show us what we want to see in our drawings, but our minds are the ones that help sculpt that image. There are so many different people in the world and so many different expressions that they can make. Stick figures may be boring after a while, always seeing the same blank face. At least a stick figure with a face has some kind of personality. Right?
Monday, July 19, 2010
Responsibility and the Future
Again my writting in this is sloppy. I did change it a little, but only a little. Most of what I am trying to say is pretty strait forward. Again, could be written better, but we only had ten minutes.
I think the topic was somewhere along the lines of being responsible (well duh). I don't feel that I need to add anymore input at this point.
AP ENGLISH III JOURNAL ENTRY #6
For the most part, adults have to be responsible. When we grow up and get jobs, or set examples mature for the people around them, that will determine if we are responsible. Adults don't have to do these things; but if they don't then how are they acting responsible. Adults should set examples for the ones who are young, why else would the young be here? They also need to be here to work for to supply the future. The future depends on what people are doing today. Today people work towards what they would like to become. What a person does for a living effects what people see in them, and in the future. What matters is hoe they are going to help feed the future. By working we are supporting ourselves as well as the people around us. If you can't live from the the world around you then how are you to survive on your own?
I think the topic was somewhere along the lines of being responsible (well duh). I don't feel that I need to add anymore input at this point.
AP ENGLISH III JOURNAL ENTRY #6
For the most part, adults have to be responsible. When we grow up and get jobs, or set examples mature for the people around them, that will determine if we are responsible. Adults don't have to do these things; but if they don't then how are they acting responsible. Adults should set examples for the ones who are young, why else would the young be here? They also need to be here to work for to supply the future. The future depends on what people are doing today. Today people work towards what they would like to become. What a person does for a living effects what people see in them, and in the future. What matters is hoe they are going to help feed the future. By working we are supporting ourselves as well as the people around us. If you can't live from the the world around you then how are you to survive on your own?
Sunday, July 18, 2010
My Purpose
The title of my blog is Searching... and I wanted to tell you all what that means, Moreover, what the whole blog is about.
At this point in my life I don't know what I'm headed for. I don't know who I'll be or what I'll do. I don't know what I want. I don't feel like I know much of anything. Life is a journey. It is a path that may lead me into different directions, and take me to where I need to be.
I feel as though I have been put on this earth for a purpose. A purpose that deals with my destiny. Now you might ask, "Isn't your purpose the same as your destiny?" I say, no, it is not. I believe that they are similar, yes, but the same, no. My purpose right now is to find my destiny. To help find it, I have brought you along for the ride.
After I had started this blog, I realized what I needed to do to keep my life in check. I needed to write. Write things down so I wouldn't forget. Forget what I no longer want to know. Know what I what to be. And be myself. What I need now is is to learn. I need to learn about the world around me and how to be myself in it. I need to figure out what I need and change myself, in order to be better and smarter.
I have this burning passion inside myself, but I do not know what it truly wants.
At this point in my life I don't know what I'm headed for. I don't know who I'll be or what I'll do. I don't know what I want. I don't feel like I know much of anything. Life is a journey. It is a path that may lead me into different directions, and take me to where I need to be.
I feel as though I have been put on this earth for a purpose. A purpose that deals with my destiny. Now you might ask, "Isn't your purpose the same as your destiny?" I say, no, it is not. I believe that they are similar, yes, but the same, no. My purpose right now is to find my destiny. To help find it, I have brought you along for the ride.
After I had started this blog, I realized what I needed to do to keep my life in check. I needed to write. Write things down so I wouldn't forget. Forget what I no longer want to know. Know what I what to be. And be myself. What I need now is is to learn. I need to learn about the world around me and how to be myself in it. I need to figure out what I need and change myself, in order to be better and smarter.
I have this burning passion inside myself, but I do not know what it truly wants.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
FML
Of all the wrotten luck. Keep in mind, I wrote this a year ago on the first day of school. My writting was rusty. Half of this stuff is true, although I tend to be a lazy stubborn person. I did get my permit, just a month later. This is my dad's fault. I am about to get my licence. Yes, it took that long. I also found a few colleges that I am interested in. However, I don't know if I can get into them. I took my ACT and only received a 19. Oh joy, I need a twenty. Volunteering was a waste. I volunteered at an animal shelter and relized something. I don't like dogs. I don't want to be a Vet anymore. Great. As for the summer job, good luck to anyone looking for a job in this economy.
AP ENGLISH III JOURNAL ENTRY #1
One short term goal to acheive this year would be to get my driver's permit this saturday (even though I should be driving already). Another would be to figure out what college to go to after school. Also, I need to save money and maybe start finding some shcolarships. I would like to pass the SATs and ACTs which will also help me with school. Finding a place to volunteer at would be a good idea since I need more hours for NHS and the place that I applied for was filled. Volunteering would also help me get a job this summer.
AP ENGLISH III JOURNAL ENTRY #1
One short term goal to acheive this year would be to get my driver's permit this saturday (even though I should be driving already). Another would be to figure out what college to go to after school. Also, I need to save money and maybe start finding some shcolarships. I would like to pass the SATs and ACTs which will also help me with school. Finding a place to volunteer at would be a good idea since I need more hours for NHS and the place that I applied for was filled. Volunteering would also help me get a job this summer.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Confessions of a Twitter Nerd
This is one of many of my journal entries from last year's Junior AP English class. I like this one the best. I even had the courage to speak my sorry-shy-ass up and read it to the class. I'll be posting more of these but in the mean time, this one will be first in line.
I have to give a narration before you read it though. The entry may speak for itself, but I want to give you some insight. I wrote this when Twitter used to say "What Are You Doing?" instead of "What's Happening?". When I was in love with my Twitter. Yes, more in love than Facebook. This was before I stopped my obsession over my "favorite musician" talked about in the entry. This was before I knew that lots of people role play on Twitter. I was very naive. I also had way to big of an imagination. Unfortunately I still do, otherwise I wouldn't have a Twitter role playing account.
This is my old Twitter confession.
AP English III Journal Entry #22
In this day in age there are many new technologies that are yet to be announced. There are so many things to keep us occupied. Ranging from all of the new things that we can do, for example, with satellite TV, the Internet, gaming systems, and so forth.
One of the most many extraordinary applications is Twitter. When it comes to the Internet, Twitter is one of the more basic and simpler applications and the best by far. "What are you doing?" That is all that the website asks. But besides updating what you are up to or stalking your favorite movie star, Twitter is useful for a number of things. A lot of people use it to share their businesses, ideas, write reviews for movies or books, or even tell their followers what music is popular.
Twitter can also be the site for massive fan-fic. Never in your wildest dreams would you imagine reading what your favorite movie or book character is doing past their movie or book, let alone "talk" to them. Really? This questions me sometimes if these the real thing or just an obsessive fan's sick joke to the richly imaginative human mind. To think that this person is just another nerd (like you) making up their own stories is appalling. And yet, people still find themselves talking to their favorite superhero about what they ate for lunch yesterday. Then again, there are the wackos who try and talk to their favorite musician even though they know deep down in their heart that they will never answer them back.
I have to give a narration before you read it though. The entry may speak for itself, but I want to give you some insight. I wrote this when Twitter used to say "What Are You Doing?" instead of "What's Happening?". When I was in love with my Twitter. Yes, more in love than Facebook. This was before I stopped my obsession over my "favorite musician" talked about in the entry. This was before I knew that lots of people role play on Twitter. I was very naive. I also had way to big of an imagination. Unfortunately I still do, otherwise I wouldn't have a Twitter role playing account.
This is my old Twitter confession.
AP English III Journal Entry #22
In this day in age there are many new technologies that are yet to be announced. There are so many things to keep us occupied. Ranging from all of the new things that we can do, for example, with satellite TV, the Internet, gaming systems, and so forth.
One of the most many extraordinary applications is Twitter. When it comes to the Internet, Twitter is one of the more basic and simpler applications and the best by far. "What are you doing?" That is all that the website asks. But besides updating what you are up to or stalking your favorite movie star, Twitter is useful for a number of things. A lot of people use it to share their businesses, ideas, write reviews for movies or books, or even tell their followers what music is popular.
Twitter can also be the site for massive fan-fic. Never in your wildest dreams would you imagine reading what your favorite movie or book character is doing past their movie or book, let alone "talk" to them. Really? This questions me sometimes if these the real thing or just an obsessive fan's sick joke to the richly imaginative human mind. To think that this person is just another nerd (like you) making up their own stories is appalling. And yet, people still find themselves talking to their favorite superhero about what they ate for lunch yesterday. Then again, there are the wackos who try and talk to their favorite musician even though they know deep down in their heart that they will never answer them back.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
I made it!
The past couple of weeks have been exhausting and crazy. First things first have got "senioritis" or "senior fever". Call it what you may, I am still not a senior. At least I'm not ready to graduate. I'm only a Junior here people. The point is, at the end of the school year I tend to get a little, well maybe not a little, lazy. I don't feel like doing anything, I stop turning in homework, my parents get mad....blah. I just start to feel like a worthless sack of nothingness. That is fine until everything else falls apart.
The next thing that happens; my aunt dies. And no she does not "die" she freaking died, dead, diesss. She killed herself and she was only 28 and a week later she would have been 29. So I freak out, right? I mean I didn't even know her that well. I wanted to. I still do. I wanted her to see me graduate. I wanted her to come to my 18th birthday party. And you know what the really shitty part is? I was in school....still. Yeah I know I had to go to school, but you know it sucks when someone dies. Couldn't they wait to give me all of those end of the year projects? I'm just a kid I can't deal with all this.
The funny thing is I have forgotten a lot about all of that, at least for a while. I sat in my room and watched The Dark Knight; which probably wasn't a good idea considering that the whole time they were screaming, "Rachel!!". (That's my aunts name). Now when I watch things or listen to people, I try not to notice. I started having dreams with her in them. And now that school is over my dreams are stil stress related. I keep dreaming about school. WHAT A NIGHTMARE!
The good thing is, I made it! I made it through the school year (with all As and Bs)!I can finally stare at the wall for a few weeks. I can finally get a job. I can finally...just breathe.
The next thing that happens; my aunt dies. And no she does not "die" she freaking died, dead, diesss. She killed herself and she was only 28 and a week later she would have been 29. So I freak out, right? I mean I didn't even know her that well. I wanted to. I still do. I wanted her to see me graduate. I wanted her to come to my 18th birthday party. And you know what the really shitty part is? I was in school....still. Yeah I know I had to go to school, but you know it sucks when someone dies. Couldn't they wait to give me all of those end of the year projects? I'm just a kid I can't deal with all this.
The funny thing is I have forgotten a lot about all of that, at least for a while. I sat in my room and watched The Dark Knight; which probably wasn't a good idea considering that the whole time they were screaming, "Rachel!!". (That's my aunts name). Now when I watch things or listen to people, I try not to notice. I started having dreams with her in them. And now that school is over my dreams are stil stress related. I keep dreaming about school. WHAT A NIGHTMARE!
The good thing is, I made it! I made it through the school year (with all As and Bs)!I can finally stare at the wall for a few weeks. I can finally get a job. I can finally...just breathe.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
I've got no master plan to help me out Or make me stand up for All the things that I really want You had me to afraid to ask And as I look ahead of me Cry and pray for sanity 'Cause everybody tries to put some love on the line And everybody feels a broken heart sometimes And even when I'm scared I have to try to fly Sometimes I fall But I've seen it done before I got to step outside these walls
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Art/Harley Randomness
I have no idea why I decided to do this. Maybe it was because I was bored again or I hated all the photos of me as Harley...Hey I am just a kid. I'm 17 not 23. I'm not an adult like Harley. So I photoshopped-more like painted over- a picture of some random model.
I put my Heath Ledger Harley version into it. I like the results!! Tell me what you think!
I put my Heath Ledger Harley version into it. I like the results!! Tell me what you think!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Yes!
I re-did my evil English paper! Guess what?! I got an A!! Well...a B because you automatically get docked 10%! I am proud of myself. Now it is time to be lazy again...just kidding.
Guess what bites? I have another project in English. Hurrah! Hurray! It is all about finding your potential and blah blah blah...oh joy more life lessons. It will help me though I need to stop being a lazy bum.
On a brighter note (semi-bright) my orchestra tour was quite peachy. I mean that both in a sarcastic and non-sarcastic way. Driving all the way to San Diego for an hour and a half concert was a waste of time. Then Driving two hours to our hotel was a waste. I hated two of the people in my room. I hated the whining, giggling, screaming little girls (in our class) in the room next door. I hated being rushed. I hated getting lost. I hated that my teacher lied to us and made me have an anxiety attack once. I hated how tired I was. I hated the slutty girls at the non-dress coded Agouro High School. I hated how Agouro High School made our class smell. I hated how Jackilin's violin got it's own seat. I hated how the other bus cuaght on fire. I hated sleeping on the bus. I hated winning an award against ourselves. And most of all I hated how Kristie treated me the whole time! FYI: she is one of my friends and she ignored me. I hate how Kristie and Maddie treated Abby when she had an anxiety attack. (They thought she was being "cranky".) Oh and I also hate how I ate like a pig and almost threw up. Joy for me.
But that is just the bad stuff! Here are some good things: I saw the most beautiful city in the world, San Diego! I got to go to Disneyland! I learned allot. I got to go inside Air Force One. I got to drive through L.A. I got to see the stars in the middle of the desert. I got to wake up one minute staring at the suburbs, and the next starting at Phoenix. I got to buy a Cheshire cat! I got to ride rides! I got to get little children annoyed at my immaturity and scream "GET SOME!" with my friends on every ride at Disneyland. I got to make Chewbacca sounds with my friends! I got to see Micky and Minnie and the singing voices of Pocahontas, Hercules, and the Hunchback perform. I got a trophy. I got to hold a trophy! The best of all I got to talk about Harley with one of my music teachers! HA! She is going to be my private teacher now! Hands down! She told me I look like Harley, the way I smile and all that! hehe I was very happy! She sounded impressed with my costume I will have to show her pictures now!!
That is all I will say for now! Next time I will post pictures!
Guess what bites? I have another project in English. Hurrah! Hurray! It is all about finding your potential and blah blah blah...oh joy more life lessons. It will help me though I need to stop being a lazy bum.
On a brighter note (semi-bright) my orchestra tour was quite peachy. I mean that both in a sarcastic and non-sarcastic way. Driving all the way to San Diego for an hour and a half concert was a waste of time. Then Driving two hours to our hotel was a waste. I hated two of the people in my room. I hated the whining, giggling, screaming little girls (in our class) in the room next door. I hated being rushed. I hated getting lost. I hated that my teacher lied to us and made me have an anxiety attack once. I hated how tired I was. I hated the slutty girls at the non-dress coded Agouro High School. I hated how Agouro High School made our class smell. I hated how Jackilin's violin got it's own seat. I hated how the other bus cuaght on fire. I hated sleeping on the bus. I hated winning an award against ourselves. And most of all I hated how Kristie treated me the whole time! FYI: she is one of my friends and she ignored me. I hate how Kristie and Maddie treated Abby when she had an anxiety attack. (They thought she was being "cranky".) Oh and I also hate how I ate like a pig and almost threw up. Joy for me.
But that is just the bad stuff! Here are some good things: I saw the most beautiful city in the world, San Diego! I got to go to Disneyland! I learned allot. I got to go inside Air Force One. I got to drive through L.A. I got to see the stars in the middle of the desert. I got to wake up one minute staring at the suburbs, and the next starting at Phoenix. I got to buy a Cheshire cat! I got to ride rides! I got to get little children annoyed at my immaturity and scream "GET SOME!" with my friends on every ride at Disneyland. I got to make Chewbacca sounds with my friends! I got to see Micky and Minnie and the singing voices of Pocahontas, Hercules, and the Hunchback perform. I got a trophy. I got to hold a trophy! The best of all I got to talk about Harley with one of my music teachers! HA! She is going to be my private teacher now! Hands down! She told me I look like Harley, the way I smile and all that! hehe I was very happy! She sounded impressed with my costume I will have to show her pictures now!!
That is all I will say for now! Next time I will post pictures!
Saturday, March 20, 2010
One Year and More Confidence
It has been a few days over a year now since I have started this blog. I still haven't done much with it. I feel lazy. Oh well, that's me!
I just want to say that I have gone through a lot to make my self esteem how it is today. Issues with my dad, unloyal friends, good friends, family, and most of all myself. I am not perfect, nor will I ever come close to being near perfect. But now I have the confidence to go to school without worrying about what people will think of me.I don't care what people think of me! I don't care if they laugh and point at what I wear. I'll laugh back! HA!
Half of it I have the Internet to thank for. Wow, does that sound odd?! Twitter, YouTube, and this blog of coarse, I love it all! I have no idea why the Internet helps me so much. I think it expands my knowledge. I read a lot and watch a lot. Good thing I don't like porn. Then I would be in trouble. I would loose all my self respect. Not that there is something wrong with you people out there who watch porn, it's just that I would be offended by myself. I'd like to keep my new confidence, thank you!
I just want to say that I have gone through a lot to make my self esteem how it is today. Issues with my dad, unloyal friends, good friends, family, and most of all myself. I am not perfect, nor will I ever come close to being near perfect. But now I have the confidence to go to school without worrying about what people will think of me.I don't care what people think of me! I don't care if they laugh and point at what I wear. I'll laugh back! HA!
Half of it I have the Internet to thank for. Wow, does that sound odd?! Twitter, YouTube, and this blog of coarse, I love it all! I have no idea why the Internet helps me so much. I think it expands my knowledge. I read a lot and watch a lot. Good thing I don't like porn. Then I would be in trouble. I would loose all my self respect. Not that there is something wrong with you people out there who watch porn, it's just that I would be offended by myself. I'd like to keep my new confidence, thank you!
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Failure
I have failed yet again!
I got an F on my research paper!! ggrrrr...but never fear I will make it up. I just have to do it over spring break, which is almost over,and before I go on tour next week.
Tour? What is that? Welllll, it's exciting and annoying at the same time, that is what it is. It is for my orchestra class, which I fail at also. I'm stuck in the same orchestra with a bunch of freshmen and sophomores. Curse my failure!! Oh well I am going to California with my friends and that is all that matters.
I am going to love tour!! Especially San Diego!! We are only going to San Diego for like three hours, but I don't care. It is one of my favorite places. Disneyland will be great also! I am going to buy every Alice in Wonderland thing I see! EVERYTHING!!
Yay new obsession for meeeee! At least I have some things to look forward to in my failure of a life. Oh my, now I sound like my mother.
I thank you especially, my one follower, you have brightened my day! :D
I got an F on my research paper!! ggrrrr...but never fear I will make it up. I just have to do it over spring break, which is almost over,and before I go on tour next week.
Tour? What is that? Welllll, it's exciting and annoying at the same time, that is what it is. It is for my orchestra class, which I fail at also. I'm stuck in the same orchestra with a bunch of freshmen and sophomores. Curse my failure!! Oh well I am going to California with my friends and that is all that matters.
I am going to love tour!! Especially San Diego!! We are only going to San Diego for like three hours, but I don't care. It is one of my favorite places. Disneyland will be great also! I am going to buy every Alice in Wonderland thing I see! EVERYTHING!!
Yay new obsession for meeeee! At least I have some things to look forward to in my failure of a life. Oh my, now I sound like my mother.
I thank you especially, my one follower, you have brightened my day! :D
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Why So Serious?
Another post from my Harley's Formspring:
Q:*whispers very softly* It was Halloween. They broke into my apartment. Killed everyone, destroyed everything. Just before they lit it on fire, the leader approaches & says: "Why so serious?" Then procedes to throw me out the window. How about you,sweetie? by EdwardDraven
A:It was my wedding day and everything was going according to plan.I was all ready in my dress. I was just told that my fiance had committed suicide, and I new something was up because the Joke escaped from Arkham just a few days ago. Then J comes in my dressing room. He says, "You look upset Harley whats wrong?" I yell at him and tell him not to call me Harley. "You're my little harlequin," he says and licks his lips , "I told you they couldn't tear us apart! heheeaaahahaa!My little harlequin you look meretricious this evening why is that so? You trying to impress Guy? Is he not good enough for you? Is that why? Well you're good enough for ME!" I'm now against the wall and still crying and freaking out at this point. "What's the matter?You look upset...you know I've always wanted to ask you this...Do you...Do you wanna know how I got these scars?" I don't answer. "DO YOU!!!" "Yes", I say choking on tears. "When I was in school all the kids used to make fun of me. They said I was too quite and too skinny to play with any of them. The teacher said I was too serious, that I wasn't like the other children. After a while I got tired of hearing, Why so serious all the time...so...." He puts a razor in my mouth and I don't even bother moving, I too scared at this point. And yet I want him to cut me. "So.. I go home and I sit in my room and you want to know what thought is going through my head? WHY So serious?! WHY SO SERIOUS!!!??? And..I do this Harley Quinn." He cuts my cheek and I fall to the ground.I scream. "But WHY stop there you only have one half a smile that is just UNACCEPTABLE!!!!" Then he cuts the other cheek.......THE END!
Q:*whispers very softly* It was Halloween. They broke into my apartment. Killed everyone, destroyed everything. Just before they lit it on fire, the leader approaches & says: "Why so serious?" Then procedes to throw me out the window. How about you,sweetie? by EdwardDraven
A:It was my wedding day and everything was going according to plan.I was all ready in my dress. I was just told that my fiance had committed suicide, and I new something was up because the Joke escaped from Arkham just a few days ago. Then J comes in my dressing room. He says, "You look upset Harley whats wrong?" I yell at him and tell him not to call me Harley. "You're my little harlequin," he says and licks his lips , "I told you they couldn't tear us apart! heheeaaahahaa!My little harlequin you look meretricious this evening why is that so? You trying to impress Guy? Is he not good enough for you? Is that why? Well you're good enough for ME!" I'm now against the wall and still crying and freaking out at this point. "What's the matter?You look upset...you know I've always wanted to ask you this...Do you...Do you wanna know how I got these scars?" I don't answer. "DO YOU!!!" "Yes", I say choking on tears. "When I was in school all the kids used to make fun of me. They said I was too quite and too skinny to play with any of them. The teacher said I was too serious, that I wasn't like the other children. After a while I got tired of hearing, Why so serious all the time...so...." He puts a razor in my mouth and I don't even bother moving, I too scared at this point. And yet I want him to cut me. "So.. I go home and I sit in my room and you want to know what thought is going through my head? WHY So serious?! WHY SO SERIOUS!!!??? And..I do this Harley Quinn." He cuts my cheek and I fall to the ground.I scream. "But WHY stop there you only have one half a smile that is just UNACCEPTABLE!!!!" Then he cuts the other cheek.......THE END!
What would be the best thing about being a vampire?
A post from my Harley Quinn's formspring. And yes most of it is true, even the blood.
What would be the best thing about being a vampire?
Absolutly nothing...That reminds me, I had a dream that I was a vampire once. There were zombies fulla synthetic blood and I couldn't eat them :( but I was REALLY REALLY HUNGRY!! So I ate him!! and then I was inna blood coma...wtf? I was dreaming in my coma and J was shaken me saying, "EAT ME! EAT ME!" Then I woke up and there was blood dripping down my body...
What would be the best thing about being a vampire?
Absolutly nothing...That reminds me, I had a dream that I was a vampire once. There were zombies fulla synthetic blood and I couldn't eat them :( but I was REALLY REALLY HUNGRY!! So I ate him!! and then I was inna blood coma...wtf? I was dreaming in my coma and J was shaken me saying, "EAT ME! EAT ME!" Then I woke up and there was blood dripping down my body...
A Natural Awakening: Sleep Medications and Their Effects
I hope this is in the right order. Here is my research paper from English. I will Explain the rest later.
At some point in people’s lives, they have all had a night where it is hard to fall or stay asleep. What most people do not realize, is that it is a type of disorder that many people suffer from on a nightly basis. Those with insomnia deal with many problems and those problems may result in more stress for the individual. It is not an easy problem to deal with insomnia (“Chronic Insomnia Medication”). People who have insomnia suffer from their body being languid. Insomnia is common with people who tend to worry and have severe amounts of stress or anxiety and is most common in elderly people, women and drug or alcohol addicts (Schench, 18). Because insomnia is not as common as bacteria being that it is only found in certain types of people, it can be difficult to find a cure.
There are two main way to treat insomnia, and the rest branch of from the dichotomy, creating an infrastructure for the cure of insomnia. First, there is taking medication such as over the counter drugs or prescription medication. Then there is the less risky natural way such as, getting sleep therapy or starting basic hygiene health habits. Both of these are ideal when trying to cure insomnia.
Finding a cure to insomnia that works is a hard one to find without dangerous health risk attached. With all the new medicines that the pharmacies have to offer, taking a pill would seem simple enough. But in reality, it is not. When looking for the best and highest possible results it can be hard to choose between the main treatments. When people take sleep aids, they are looking for accurate results, but are the benefits outweighing the risks? There are more risks taken when a patient is using sleep medication.
Most over the counter and prescription drugs are not recommended for use over long periods of time (“Your Guide to the Best Sleeping Pills Today”). In other words they are meant to be taken when they truly need it, not when they are wanted. This is not ideal for an insomniac who has trouble sleeping almost every night. If the drugs are taken every night they can become highly addicting, leading to even more sleepless nights, and addiction which may lead to an overdose causing death. Treatment should come without risks, no risks means an essay cure and no addiction.
In this day and age there are more ways causing people to get tired. Becoming lazy will not do anything to help insomnia. Taking over the counter sleep aids, is not the best option. You do not need a doctor to use it, which means that the patient taking this medication is not willing enough to talk to their doctor about the side effects and to find out if this medication is right for them. Because they are not meant for insomnia sufferers, they should not be tried to cure insomnia, plain and simple.
Melatonin is a natural chemical hormone that is created in the brain that is essential for normal sleep (Graedon, 333). The only risk in taking this chemical is that it is slow. Most people find that it is only effective if taken a few hours before they sleep, because it takes a while to be released into the brain. If taken at the correct time melatonin can reduce the amount of time it takes to fall asleep as well as the time spent sleeping (Graedon, 333). Although it may seem like the perfect solution, melatonin can come with side effects. Having the same risks as a sleeping pill, melatonin the hormone supplement, can cause a morning “hangover” which includes dizziness, headaches, and tiredness (Graedon, 334). Just like a sleeping pill, what would be the point of taking melatonin if is just going to make you feel worse in the morning? On top of that, an insomniac would not want to take something that is going to harm them and make them worry more about their sleep troubles.
Besides taking melatonin daily as a pill, it can be produced naturally in many other ways. They are cognitive to each other but this comes without risks. Some of these options can be more relaxing, helping the body have a more enjoyable sleep. Taking a hot bath before bedtime can help. It’s relaxing and can help produce melatonin. A bath “raises the core body temperature” and as it drops” your body will produce melatonin (Graedon, 329). Another option would be to dim the lights. Watching television or staring at the computer screen before bed “can trick your circadian clock” (Schench, 23). Avoiding light before and during bedtime can produce melatonin. By using and producing melatonin can increase chances of curing insomnia. This leaves out the risks of sleep medications. The easiest and safest way to take melatonin is to produce it naturally, because it comes without the risks of taking melatonin as a pill. Without side effects there is no worry and no worry means a better sleep at night.
People are afraid to make lifestyle changes. That is another reason that people are more likely to take sleeping pills. What they do not realize is that there are more risks being taken. Some prescription medications can cause patients to become drowsy in their awakening (Schench, 23). Taking medicine to aid sleep should not cause people to become more uncomfortable. Luckily, medicines have been developed with “a low incidence of side effects” but through research the risks can vary (Schench, 24). Because everybody has a different body they are going to have to take different risks when taking sleep medication. For example elderly people taking Lunesta have woken up to be dizzy and out of place (Graedon, 337). By developing lifestyle changes and healthy sleep hygiene habits there are no risks to be taken.
As a way to cure insomnia doctors recommend “daily exercise as a way to reduce stress” (“Insomnia”). The perfect type of exercise for this is yoga or any type of exercise that utilizes breathing. Yoga can sublimate the body as well as the mind and can help to relieve stress. Keeping a steady balance of exercise a few hours before sleep can slow down and prepare the body for a better night sleep. Timing is also key when planning out a daily exercise routine. Exercise is not recommended right before bed. That is why most people can be skeptical about using exercise to treat their insomnia. This is because exercise simulates the body and makes it harder to fall asleep right after a workout (Schench, 22). This can be such a wonderful healthy lifestyle choice that can be beneficial to both sleep and the body being physically fit as well. Can a sleeping pill do that?
There have been many other simple things that have been found to help improve sleeping habits. There are plenty of things, as mentioned earlier, that insomniacs may also so everyday that can help them fall asleep, but many of them do not realize it. A huge setback would, obviously, be the consumption of caffeine. This can be extremely important when it comes to the treatment of insomnia. Beverages such as chamomile tea does not contain caffeine like most other teas, which can help aid sleep. However, beverages like decaffeinated coffee are not always the solution either. They can cause heartburn “which can trigger acid reflex that may wake you up” (Graedon, 328).
Yet again there is another natural way to aid sleep, which would be listening to relaxing music. Like most other remedies people think that this is “touchy-feely New Age nonsense” (Graedon, 329). But without trying it people will never know if the music works or not. Research and studies have been done that have showed that insomniacs “had less trouble getting to sleep, fell asleep more quickly, and had better sleep quality” when listening to calming music (Graedon, 330). This method is effective because it helps to relieve stress and there are no risks that need to be taken in order to have a satisfying sleep.
Just like caffeine and exercise, some types of medicines can act as stimulants (Schench, 20). To ensure a healthy sleep and find a cure to a patient’s insomnia, simple avoidances like these may not have even crossed the mind of the insomniac. This is why cognitive-behavioral therapy is ideal for insomniacs to have. If an insomniac gets help it is more likely that there will be less risk taking. They can make positive lifestyle choices, learn simple sleep hygiene tips, and get a cure for their disorder. That is three benefits in one.
Gayle Green, a chronic insomniac, has tried nearly everything there is to try to cure her insomnia, but what she hasn’t tried is the “ordeal therapy” (Green, 6-7). What severe insomniacs need most of all is sleep therapy. Investigators have found that Cognitive-behavioral therapy is more effective than some types of sleep medications (Graedon, 330). The only reason people are unlikely to commit to sleep therapy is because it can be time consuming. For example taking a pill and falling asleep right away is easier and faster than having to take time out of their lives to see their therapist. Another reason that people are skeptical about therapy is the price. People get scared when it comes to money, and stress is a huge reason why people have trouble sleeping at night. However what most people do not know is that cognitive-behavioral therapy is only costly if not covered by a health plan (Schenk). Otherwise, sleep therapy doesn’t come with any unhealthy risks and can be highly effective when treating insomnia.
The difference between sleeping the natural way and taking a pill is the knowledge that is involved. Patients need to know why they are suffering from insomnia. That way they can be more productive with their lives, solve the problem, and be able to sleep at night. There is a reason or a cause for everything. Insomnia is no exception. Why would they risk taking a pill for the rest of their life when they can find out what is causing the problem and learn how to fix it. This way insomniacs will have more acumen about their disorder.
Therapy is the mot juste of all the cures for insomnia. It is much more rewarding than trying to cure by taking medication. It is a learning experience. With the knowledge an insomniac can use it for the rest of his/her life, without any side effects. They have everything they have learned and it does not just cure their insomnia, it develops healthy lifestyle changes. Therapy will not only help patients get to sleep at night, but it will also help keep the patients healthy and fit for years to come.
If medicine is the only thing that is taken to aid sleep, insomniacs will still have the fear of not being able to sleep at night. Pills are an appurtenance to sleep. If the medication is taken away, the insomniac will still have the problems that they have always been having. “Once you’ve experienced insomnia, you may worry about it the next night” (Schench, 20). This is another risk taken when using sleep medications. There is never an actual cure, but instead there is something to try and keeps your body relying on one thing throughout life. Unlike a sleeping pill remedies “remind you of what it feels like to get a good night’s sleep” (Schench, 29) Leaving no worries the next night whether or not the insomniac will be able to sleep or not. Sleep needs to be beatitude for an insomniac.
No one wants to be uncomfortable. Finding a cure to an uncomfortable disorder should not have to be either. Sleep should not be a bête noire to insomniacs. The best risk free solution to go is to talk to a doctor, get help from therapy, and use natural remedies. All of these ways can be effective because they come with less risks. Insomnias will only be comfortable when insomnia is removed from their lives.
Insomnia can be cured if the right precautions are taken. Risks can be avoided to get the best possible results. Risks are just the curveball in treating insomnia. The only possible way to cure insomnia is to find a sleep aid with no risks. It is very important for insomniac to find a cure. Because it is difficult to find a cure the answer is to choose the easiest solution. In a time were people are busy and rushing around they should take time out of there lives to figure out what needs to be changed. “Getting a good night’s sleep is crucial to your health” (Graedon, 340). Having a healthy lifestyle comes with the cure to insomnia. If insomnia is treated the proper way with out risks a healthier happier lifestyle can be achieved.
At some point in people’s lives, they have all had a night where it is hard to fall or stay asleep. What most people do not realize, is that it is a type of disorder that many people suffer from on a nightly basis. Those with insomnia deal with many problems and those problems may result in more stress for the individual. It is not an easy problem to deal with insomnia (“Chronic Insomnia Medication”). People who have insomnia suffer from their body being languid. Insomnia is common with people who tend to worry and have severe amounts of stress or anxiety and is most common in elderly people, women and drug or alcohol addicts (Schench, 18). Because insomnia is not as common as bacteria being that it is only found in certain types of people, it can be difficult to find a cure.
There are two main way to treat insomnia, and the rest branch of from the dichotomy, creating an infrastructure for the cure of insomnia. First, there is taking medication such as over the counter drugs or prescription medication. Then there is the less risky natural way such as, getting sleep therapy or starting basic hygiene health habits. Both of these are ideal when trying to cure insomnia.
Finding a cure to insomnia that works is a hard one to find without dangerous health risk attached. With all the new medicines that the pharmacies have to offer, taking a pill would seem simple enough. But in reality, it is not. When looking for the best and highest possible results it can be hard to choose between the main treatments. When people take sleep aids, they are looking for accurate results, but are the benefits outweighing the risks? There are more risks taken when a patient is using sleep medication.
Most over the counter and prescription drugs are not recommended for use over long periods of time (“Your Guide to the Best Sleeping Pills Today”). In other words they are meant to be taken when they truly need it, not when they are wanted. This is not ideal for an insomniac who has trouble sleeping almost every night. If the drugs are taken every night they can become highly addicting, leading to even more sleepless nights, and addiction which may lead to an overdose causing death. Treatment should come without risks, no risks means an essay cure and no addiction.
In this day and age there are more ways causing people to get tired. Becoming lazy will not do anything to help insomnia. Taking over the counter sleep aids, is not the best option. You do not need a doctor to use it, which means that the patient taking this medication is not willing enough to talk to their doctor about the side effects and to find out if this medication is right for them. Because they are not meant for insomnia sufferers, they should not be tried to cure insomnia, plain and simple.
Melatonin is a natural chemical hormone that is created in the brain that is essential for normal sleep (Graedon, 333). The only risk in taking this chemical is that it is slow. Most people find that it is only effective if taken a few hours before they sleep, because it takes a while to be released into the brain. If taken at the correct time melatonin can reduce the amount of time it takes to fall asleep as well as the time spent sleeping (Graedon, 333). Although it may seem like the perfect solution, melatonin can come with side effects. Having the same risks as a sleeping pill, melatonin the hormone supplement, can cause a morning “hangover” which includes dizziness, headaches, and tiredness (Graedon, 334). Just like a sleeping pill, what would be the point of taking melatonin if is just going to make you feel worse in the morning? On top of that, an insomniac would not want to take something that is going to harm them and make them worry more about their sleep troubles.
Besides taking melatonin daily as a pill, it can be produced naturally in many other ways. They are cognitive to each other but this comes without risks. Some of these options can be more relaxing, helping the body have a more enjoyable sleep. Taking a hot bath before bedtime can help. It’s relaxing and can help produce melatonin. A bath “raises the core body temperature” and as it drops” your body will produce melatonin (Graedon, 329). Another option would be to dim the lights. Watching television or staring at the computer screen before bed “can trick your circadian clock” (Schench, 23). Avoiding light before and during bedtime can produce melatonin. By using and producing melatonin can increase chances of curing insomnia. This leaves out the risks of sleep medications. The easiest and safest way to take melatonin is to produce it naturally, because it comes without the risks of taking melatonin as a pill. Without side effects there is no worry and no worry means a better sleep at night.
People are afraid to make lifestyle changes. That is another reason that people are more likely to take sleeping pills. What they do not realize is that there are more risks being taken. Some prescription medications can cause patients to become drowsy in their awakening (Schench, 23). Taking medicine to aid sleep should not cause people to become more uncomfortable. Luckily, medicines have been developed with “a low incidence of side effects” but through research the risks can vary (Schench, 24). Because everybody has a different body they are going to have to take different risks when taking sleep medication. For example elderly people taking Lunesta have woken up to be dizzy and out of place (Graedon, 337). By developing lifestyle changes and healthy sleep hygiene habits there are no risks to be taken.
As a way to cure insomnia doctors recommend “daily exercise as a way to reduce stress” (“Insomnia”). The perfect type of exercise for this is yoga or any type of exercise that utilizes breathing. Yoga can sublimate the body as well as the mind and can help to relieve stress. Keeping a steady balance of exercise a few hours before sleep can slow down and prepare the body for a better night sleep. Timing is also key when planning out a daily exercise routine. Exercise is not recommended right before bed. That is why most people can be skeptical about using exercise to treat their insomnia. This is because exercise simulates the body and makes it harder to fall asleep right after a workout (Schench, 22). This can be such a wonderful healthy lifestyle choice that can be beneficial to both sleep and the body being physically fit as well. Can a sleeping pill do that?
There have been many other simple things that have been found to help improve sleeping habits. There are plenty of things, as mentioned earlier, that insomniacs may also so everyday that can help them fall asleep, but many of them do not realize it. A huge setback would, obviously, be the consumption of caffeine. This can be extremely important when it comes to the treatment of insomnia. Beverages such as chamomile tea does not contain caffeine like most other teas, which can help aid sleep. However, beverages like decaffeinated coffee are not always the solution either. They can cause heartburn “which can trigger acid reflex that may wake you up” (Graedon, 328).
Yet again there is another natural way to aid sleep, which would be listening to relaxing music. Like most other remedies people think that this is “touchy-feely New Age nonsense” (Graedon, 329). But without trying it people will never know if the music works or not. Research and studies have been done that have showed that insomniacs “had less trouble getting to sleep, fell asleep more quickly, and had better sleep quality” when listening to calming music (Graedon, 330). This method is effective because it helps to relieve stress and there are no risks that need to be taken in order to have a satisfying sleep.
Just like caffeine and exercise, some types of medicines can act as stimulants (Schench, 20). To ensure a healthy sleep and find a cure to a patient’s insomnia, simple avoidances like these may not have even crossed the mind of the insomniac. This is why cognitive-behavioral therapy is ideal for insomniacs to have. If an insomniac gets help it is more likely that there will be less risk taking. They can make positive lifestyle choices, learn simple sleep hygiene tips, and get a cure for their disorder. That is three benefits in one.
Gayle Green, a chronic insomniac, has tried nearly everything there is to try to cure her insomnia, but what she hasn’t tried is the “ordeal therapy” (Green, 6-7). What severe insomniacs need most of all is sleep therapy. Investigators have found that Cognitive-behavioral therapy is more effective than some types of sleep medications (Graedon, 330). The only reason people are unlikely to commit to sleep therapy is because it can be time consuming. For example taking a pill and falling asleep right away is easier and faster than having to take time out of their lives to see their therapist. Another reason that people are skeptical about therapy is the price. People get scared when it comes to money, and stress is a huge reason why people have trouble sleeping at night. However what most people do not know is that cognitive-behavioral therapy is only costly if not covered by a health plan (Schenk). Otherwise, sleep therapy doesn’t come with any unhealthy risks and can be highly effective when treating insomnia.
The difference between sleeping the natural way and taking a pill is the knowledge that is involved. Patients need to know why they are suffering from insomnia. That way they can be more productive with their lives, solve the problem, and be able to sleep at night. There is a reason or a cause for everything. Insomnia is no exception. Why would they risk taking a pill for the rest of their life when they can find out what is causing the problem and learn how to fix it. This way insomniacs will have more acumen about their disorder.
Therapy is the mot juste of all the cures for insomnia. It is much more rewarding than trying to cure by taking medication. It is a learning experience. With the knowledge an insomniac can use it for the rest of his/her life, without any side effects. They have everything they have learned and it does not just cure their insomnia, it develops healthy lifestyle changes. Therapy will not only help patients get to sleep at night, but it will also help keep the patients healthy and fit for years to come.
If medicine is the only thing that is taken to aid sleep, insomniacs will still have the fear of not being able to sleep at night. Pills are an appurtenance to sleep. If the medication is taken away, the insomniac will still have the problems that they have always been having. “Once you’ve experienced insomnia, you may worry about it the next night” (Schench, 20). This is another risk taken when using sleep medications. There is never an actual cure, but instead there is something to try and keeps your body relying on one thing throughout life. Unlike a sleeping pill remedies “remind you of what it feels like to get a good night’s sleep” (Schench, 29) Leaving no worries the next night whether or not the insomniac will be able to sleep or not. Sleep needs to be beatitude for an insomniac.
No one wants to be uncomfortable. Finding a cure to an uncomfortable disorder should not have to be either. Sleep should not be a bête noire to insomniacs. The best risk free solution to go is to talk to a doctor, get help from therapy, and use natural remedies. All of these ways can be effective because they come with less risks. Insomnias will only be comfortable when insomnia is removed from their lives.
Insomnia can be cured if the right precautions are taken. Risks can be avoided to get the best possible results. Risks are just the curveball in treating insomnia. The only possible way to cure insomnia is to find a sleep aid with no risks. It is very important for insomniac to find a cure. Because it is difficult to find a cure the answer is to choose the easiest solution. In a time were people are busy and rushing around they should take time out of there lives to figure out what needs to be changed. “Getting a good night’s sleep is crucial to your health” (Graedon, 340). Having a healthy lifestyle comes with the cure to insomnia. If insomnia is treated the proper way with out risks a healthier happier lifestyle can be achieved.
My Harley Quinn
Alright so this time I have decided not to even try to think of a topic. I start writing things down and they get all messed up.I'll just go with what my head gives me this time!
For Halloween last year (I guess it could be this year if you are going by school years) I was Harley Quinn. If you don't know already, I am completely obsessed with her. No not in a gay way...but she is pretty hot...anyway...I made the costume and everything. By the way, I wasn't the original Harley either, I was Heath's Harley (as in Heath Ledger's Joker). Do you know how hard it is to be creative? It's really hard. First of all I should have written about this AS I was actually doing the project, but I didn't... classic Natalie.
It was hard to find a pattern for my costume.I am not a fashion design student so going to Hobby Lobby and browzing for costume patterns made this a little simpler.I found the perfect pattern! It was for a fairy costume but hey it looks like a modern clown to me! I looked with my best friend in the whole wide world, Jordan. Me and Jordan know nothing about sewing what so ever. Because of this we might have made a few buying mistakes. Oh well...beginners luck I had bought just enough fabrics. Which reminds me, I have extras.
Now the worst part of all was making the stupid thing. I asked my grandmother because she had experience with a sewing machine, and making my previous Halloween costumes for that matter. The worst thing is, she does not know how to read a pattern. When she finally figured something out, she would sit there for about ten minutes saying' "Oh fooey, that's not right." I reply by saying, "Grandma look," I point to the pattern and the pictures, "see here that's RIGHT. You were right." Or I would roll my eyes, "You're not looking at the right one."
I can stand a few days of torture to get my Harley just right!
Speaking of torture, and the amount of hard work put into this, no one knew who the Hell I was at the Halloween party. I had to explain that I wasn't a juggalo and I was NOT from ICP.
The most torturous of all is when people DO know who Harley is and won't except my changes to her. My Harley is not the original Bruce Timm and Pual Dini Harley!! If every Joker was the same Heath Ledger may not have been dead and I never would have found out who Harley was in the first place. Yes, I know that is a completely different character, but let me explain.
The Joker' character has changed MANY times....why can't Harley? The Joker has different looks...why can't Harley? The Joker has different voices...why can't Harley? If Harley's significant other can be changed then why can't Harley's character? Now this is just one example. Every Batman character has went through some kind of change. I'm just saying that Harley's is hard to change because of her character. We WANT to keep that harlequin, but to match Heath's we can't. Sorry that's the way it works. Harley can be depressed and Harley CAN be evil, I've made it happen. I've made it happen so that Harley can have a positive change and she can still be the same old Harley...but she's MY Harley....NO! SHE'S HEATH'S HARLEY!!!
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Laziness is Lame!
I was kind of half expecting that I would forget my password but the again...
Oh well, it's good to see you again (or is that write to you again). Haven't done this in a while because well I don't have time first of all. And I know that really isn't true because I spend most of my time on twitter anyways rather than doing the homework that is going to help get me into college.
Speaking of college...I still have no idea what the heck I'm going to do for the rest of my life. And there still is the fact that I don't know my place in the world. These things kind of go together don't you think?
Keep on searching for who you are!
<3 Natalie
Oh well, it's good to see you again (or is that write to you again). Haven't done this in a while because well I don't have time first of all. And I know that really isn't true because I spend most of my time on twitter anyways rather than doing the homework that is going to help get me into college.
Speaking of college...I still have no idea what the heck I'm going to do for the rest of my life. And there still is the fact that I don't know my place in the world. These things kind of go together don't you think?
Keep on searching for who you are!
<3 Natalie
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